10_yard_fight's Journal

3:26PM - I'm twitching like a finger on the trigger of a gun...

So... Joe called me at 3am last night and wanted to come over. I said sure. He had a little alcohol in him, but he wasn't drunk. He wanted to have sex and so did I, but I didn't want to, because I didn't want to be a booty called. I said no, but then later, I changed my mind and we did sleep together. Opps. I don't regret it. I orgasmed. First time in a long time. He was going to put it in and I said, don't I get to get off too?, so he wen't down on me. Yeah!! Anyway, I'm still sorting things out with Joe. I still have strong feelings for him. I think most of it has to do with how he makes me feel. Pretty and desired.

If I was wife Mike, I don't think he would do that. He's not mush for touching. He wouldn't smack my ass when I climb stairs, ya know? I had another dream about him. I don't know if I mentioned my make-out dream about him, but yeah I had one. And then last night he and I were cuddling (in my dream) on a bed and he left the room and Josh S came in and started cuddling with me. Mike came back and he was pissed. He told Josh to leave me alone because I was with him. And in the dream I remember being really confused because Mike and I weren't dating and I didn't know why he cared that Josh and I were cuddling. So there ya have it.

That other Josh, 30 yr old Josh, text messaged me last night at like 12:30, but I was sleeping. That whole sit is kinda creepy. I wish boys my own age would treat me like him. I mean there's Paul, Nick Farr and now him who are all 30 or close to it, that were totally obsessed with me. Why can't someone close to my own age feel like that? Yuck.

I saw Dan last night. He was dropping off some girl at Morning Star, luckily I was with Mike, and two other guys, Kevin and Eric, so I didn't feel like a loser. I grabbed Mike's arm and told him Dan was over there, and he like "Where, where is he?", which Dan probably heard which is embarassing. Oh well, fuck it. The girl was a total scenster. Holy shit.

Why are my posts all about guys? It's kinda pathetic. I guess because I leave all this stuff out from my public journal. and I need to put it somewhere. I'm hungry

Mike and I are seeing Fantastic Four tonight. It's gonna rock.

Current mood: dirty